The uphill battle we face.
Most of the people that post on The Punkboard, and read this would consider themselves people about town. By that we mean people who go out, enjoy the nightlife, like going out and getting drunk with your friends.
It just seems to us that these days it’s getting really really hard to do that these days. And most people seem to be ok with it, which is even more disgusting. So we present to you a list of people who we found on Yelp! that seem to think what’s going on right now is perfectly ok. As you can see they wear uniforms, and are generally an unsavory group of people that are to be avoided at all costs.
Call us haters, but we’re just calling it like it is.
Edgar N.: So this guy is FAMOUS DJ Edgartronic who DJs at places and probably gets oral from scene chicks so he’ll play that Le Tigre mash-up that makes them go FUCKING NUTS. Now, this is just idle speculation but I bet he never went to Scolari’s because he could never get booked as a DJ there. Now he writes a glowing review (but not 5 stars, he has Integrity!) about the Office so he can get gigs there to further his craft. Save some coke for me, brother!
Ikah Love: So this fucking guy hosts Saturday nights weekly at “the Office”, in addition to a series of parties called Shake Appeal where a bunch of fucking coke heads get together and do coke off of Josh Mosh’s dick.
Eurotrash: This fucking idiot thinks that we all should just get over the gentrification of North Park and go about our lives. As you can see from her Yelp page she thinks every place ever deserves 4 or 5 stars, including The Office (where if you read into it, I get the impression that she thinks poor people shouldn’t be allowed to get a beer), though she is bummed the Beauty Bar isn’t what it used to be. Is it because she no long works the door there? It’s ok honey, I’m sure you can still find a dance floor that produces carnage.
Marisol C.: This is the most poorly-written piece of shit review I have ever read. But i’ll be sure to ask Bruce about his anchor tattoo, lol.
Daye: According to this guy, everyone who hung out at Scolari’s was a shit person. Say it to our face.
We’re kind of drunk, we’re writing this at 4:30AM (and still no spelling mistakes!), and if our editor lets us publish this article, look for a lot more like this where we call out people who we think are doing San Diego wrong by thinking its perfectly ok to let bars come in that have dress codes, expensive drinks and door guys wearing suits. You can say that you don’t want to go downtown because they’re all douchebags down there, but most of you people only say that shit to seem urban and sophisticated.
Places like the Office and U-31 are bringing the downtown experience to North Park. Deny it all you want, but its true. There is nothing different about those places and any downtown club, except you can’t get a Pedi-cab to take you from club-to-club. One might say, “Well, its the crowd”, and to that we will restate our original thesis: The whole point of going to a bar is to go out with friends and get drunk, ergo crowds shouldn’t matter. If you don’t want the stigma of being a “downtown type,” then find somewhere else. We’ve had North Park for years, and quite frankly - we’d rather you leave.
But fortunately you HAVE been in North Park for years (no, it’s cool we totally believe you), you just weren’t supporting old, family-owned businesses because they are disgusting shit holes where you might catch the plague. I mean Scolari’s totally smelled like piss, and Shooterz was totally a fag bar- they’re novelties. The North Park deli was never very good, I’m glad it’s now Urban Solace. They have sweet potato fries! Yum! You say you’re against the gentrification of North Park but you support the businesses that are bringing it. At least the people who go downtown know their place.
Comment by dustin
Which one of you faggots wrote this?
Comment by DJ Edgartronic
I’ve got haters…rad.
That Le Tigre mashup blows.
Ask Donny about Monday nights at Scolari’s…one of my first gigs EVAR.
Comment by Morgan Young
Haha….rad!
Comment by That Girl
Haha! Thanks for sending me this link Morgs!
Comment by Sarah
Boo hoo, some people actually grow up and like to go to nice places in their own neighborhood now that they have real jobs and aren’t still stuck in high-school worries about what’s “cool” and not. Grow up.
Comment by Morgan Young (again)
FYI, the dudes that own PB Bar & Grill just bought Shooters. KABOOM!
Comment by Brendy
Sarah is an idiot.
Comment by Jack
The real problem here is… the gentrification of cell phones. Fuck that. I keep it real. iPhone? Cordless phone? Get off! That’s why I only use rotary phones. Alexander Graham Bell would have wanted it that way. All the rest of you people who upgraded to touch-tone phones have NO respect and you should hate yourselves. Have fun doing all sorts of cool things like “checking voice mail” or “texting your buddy.” Meanwhile, I’ll be here fighting that “uphill” battle to keep it street.
Skeet skeet.
Yeah, how ridiculous did that sound? Exactly. Tobacco Rhodas is still pumping, I suggest you make that your new spot. I just saw a homeless dude piss himself there last week. Sounds like it’s right up your alley, homey.
Comment by Brendy
Jack, you’re an idiot, too.
Gentrification of cell phones? How ridiculous! Oh, wait! That analogy was supposed to get me to think gentrification is a ridiculous notion, right? Cos, hell… gentrification of North Park is only IMPROVING North Park! We all win! Fuck the displaced people that are forced to move east and south east cos the construction of La Boheme is bringing in better clientele for The New Office. Let’s just give developers more incentives for redevelopment! YAY!
Wait, why am I even talking about this? All you people care about is some stupid bar and where the next place Norton is going to take your photos.
I hope you all die.
Comment by Charles
DJ’s are a scourge that need to be wiped out.
Comment by sarahg
brendy pretty much just worked you
Comment by blargh
the douchenozzles will always win.
Comment by Jeff
Damn, punkboard gotta fancy shmanzy new layout…just sayin
Comment by Bear Paw
“Boo hoo, some people actually grow up and like to go to nice places in their own neighborhood now that they have real jobs and aren’t still stuck in high-school worries about what’s “cool” and not. Grow up.” - Sarah
The first thing I think when I see the new generation of bar monsters is that they don’t worry about whats “cool”. They don’t spend hours trying to get their hair just perfect or spend days searching “thrift” stores for the perfect pants that are 4 sizes too small.
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[...] going to blow our mind at the Beauty Bar on Tuesday! DJ Edgartronic, despite what we said in our last piece, is a solid guy, but we do stand by those comments. We think Mario Orduno is funny, we see him at [...]
Comment by Jack
Why would you pick on Norton? That’s fucking retarded. Ever met the guy? He’s a really nice dude who’s just trying to make a buck. Low blow, moron. What has he done to you? Seriously… I’d love to hear it. Did you get hugged enough as a child? Apparently not. Sorry your Dad isn’t around and your mom is banging some dude she met at an Elks Lodge potluck. Your attitude makes me sick. You’re a hater who will probably never contribute anything positive to society. You’ll just hang around town, bitching to anyone who will listen to your insignificant bullshit. Best of luck with life, bud.
For the record, if you actually came to the table with a well thought out argument as to why you’re unhappy with the evolution of North Park, I would gladly absorb the information. It’s just annoying when people have the audacity to hate for no reason other than the inconvenience of losing a dive bar that smelled like piss. It’s even more annoying when people bad mouth another individual publicly for no reason whatsoever. I respect this blog and read it regularly, but enough is enough.
Thank you.
Comment by schmoopie
Jack, you ignorant slut.
Comment by Brendy
I’m sure Jack was replying to me, the polite thing to do would be to reply back.
Jack, you’re an idiot PT II:
Nowhere in my comment did I “pick” on Norton. What I said was “All you people care about is some stupid bar and where the next place Norton is going to take your photos.” How is that picking on him? HELLO. I was making fun of you, if anything, not him. I merely mentioned him, you tard. Norton has never done anything to me, why do you ask? OH COS YOU SUCK AT READING COMPREHENSION AND BELIEVE I MADE FUN OF HIM. OH. Idiot.
Jack, you want a well thought out argument why the “evolution” of North Park makes me unhappy? I explained that. And, although the end of Scolari’s makes me sad, that’s not all I care about. If you don’t understand why gentrification is bad, pick up a fucking book and learn something.
READ, UNDERSTAND, THEN POST.
Comment by Charles Barkley
You are all faggots.
Comment by some dude who likes blufoot
anybody wanna buy a fork?
Comment by Dustin
Jack reads this blog regularly. Jack knew about this blog before it was cool. Jacks a jackass, this blog is new and only has 4 or 5 stories.
Comment by the internet
this blog was cool before it was on the internet
its rly cool how theres tons of comments and people all pist off and stuff that prolly dont even know about punkboard
Comment by demetrius
Brendy is a fat miserable schoolteacher bitch. She is so overweight and has so many rolls of fat I doubt she can find a dildo long enough to jab her stinky hole. She is a hypochondiac whiner that is online 24/7 from both her school and whatever pathetic roommate situation she is in. Maybe the fat beaner bitch needs to shut the fuck up. Go get a personality and a life and come on back. Go to the farmer’s market and get weighed. Tape that number to your refrigerator you bloated, fat, nauseating, cunt.
Comment by Brendy
sweet